Getting past the little things to get what you want 3:45 to 4:
BLOG By: Marc Freeman
You can’t make a deal without considering the details. Each one is important to somebody. But how to take the deal from their details to yours without either party getting bogged down in the middle is like running a relay race through an obstacle course.
Here are my techniques for clearing the hurdles:
1) Make a list
Know what the issues are, and what you would ideally like to get out of each one. You don’t have to be practical at this stage—what may seem far-fetched to you could be a walk in the park for the other side. Make sure to include what concessions you have to get in order to reach your goal—your deal-breakers. Walking into any negotiation without this list is like going into a race handicapped. You will be unprepared and won’t be able to accomplish everything you need to do to be successful. A list gives you a path to follow so you don’t forget anything.
2) Rate your list
Number your list based on the importance, keeping in mind that the order may change as the negotiations progress. Realize that you might have to concede some points in order to gain others. If you don’t rank your list, you won’t know which details can be sacrificed to achieve the more important goals. Be sure to listen to the other party so you know what their concerns and details are. As they outline theirs, it might make some of yours irrelevant. You need to be prepared to reassess your ratings as you go.
3) Start small
Don’t jump into negotiations with the biggest item on your list. You will only decrease the likelihood of getting what you want. Start with a few of the easy things on your list to create a common ground and as you reach agreement on those, each subsequent discussion will go more smoothly. But only a few--if you bring up too many details first, by the time you get to the more important items on your list the other party will feel like they have already given too much and will be much less likely to want to help you achieve your larger goals.
4) Don’t just focus on yourself
Remember to listen to the other side as you go. This is an opportunity for you to find out what their big issues are and to create an environment of give and take. If you don’t identify and address their main goals, you will run into roadblocks for your own list of goals. You never know, their big issue may be very easy for you to accommodate and this will make them much easier to deal with.
5) Come back to some of the smaller issues
After you wrap up some of the larger issues, you can go back to the smaller unresolved issues on your list. After reaching an agreement on each party’s main goal, the smaller objectives won’t present a problem. Many times, the other party is so invested at this stage that they will be willing to concede the smaller issues just to wrap up the deal.
Don’t forget to constantly reassess your list as you progress through the negotiation. Each agreement you reach will have an affect on the remaining items on your list. It may even make some irrelevant. Stay focused on the bigger picture. Walking into any negotiation with a clear plan and a flexible mindset can help form the partnership that you envisioned when you first started the negotiation process.
Transcend the details!
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